The facts as told by me

For those of you unfamiliar with this grand expedition, allow me to fill you in on the Who's, Why's, When's and Where's of the situation.

I, Geoffrey Holland Agnew, am going to attempt to ride my bicycle across 10 Provinces starting in May of 2006. Now, before you start throwing words around like 'hero' or 'super star athlete' let me assure you I am little more than a common Canadian boy with big dreams. My reasons for this trip are numerous:

1) I have only been to 4 of Canada's 10 provinces, and the extent of my travel in 2 of those 4 was superficial at best. Can I really say I know BC if I've only seen Stanley Park and the Gondola on Whistler mountain? Does time spent in R. Jabbaz's charming squat in Halifax constitute a comprehensive understanding of Nova Scotia? Yes these are all interesting Canadian locales, but I'm looking for something a little more robust (like the shoulder of the Trans Canada Highway).

2) I need a break from Toronto. This city has been good to me, but spending another summer here sucking back acrid air and scrambling to get to work on time is frightening. I'm a lout. I want to lie around in the sun like a gluttonous beaver and watch my toenails grow. Toronto doesn't offer me that. Besides, if I stayed here and lived off my egg, I'd probably spend it all in a month on falafels. Then what would I have to show? Rotten innards.

3) I see this as a rite of passage. If I was living on some remote island in Indonesia, my father would have taken me out to the edge of the woods, handed me a blunt stick and told me to get lost for a month or four. What does the modern man have to do? Nothing. We're crap. Truly and honestly. If I get eaten by a bear I'm a chump. If I pack it in after Ontario I'm a chump. If I get lost in the wilds of Manitoba and my parents have to get me airlifted back to civilization, I am a chump. Completing this trip means that I am at least in some small capacity, able to survive on my own.

That pretty much covers the Who's, Why's and When's. The Where's coming up next.